This originally appeared in BCN issue 100.

One of the things BCN never had in our first 99 issues was a proper Cosmo style quiz to help you answer this big question. 

Puzzle no more!  At last we reveal, through the power of multiple choice questions… What Type of Bisexual are YOU?

Q1    You see an advert for a one day event for bisexuals.  Your first reaction is:

Great, another event, I’ll go and enjoy myself.    (note your score: b)
Great, another event, I’ll go and enjoy myself.  Wonder if they need any help? (score: c)
Hope enough people get to read this and it goes okay on the day.    (d)
I want to go but I won’t know anyone and I’m not even sure I’m bisexual anyway.     (a)
It’s another event that’ll be fun but won’t change the big picture.    (f)
They haven’t used the correct term, “bisexual” just isn’t inclusive enough!    (e)

Q2    You are at an event and there’s a lot of rubbish accumulating.  Do you:

Ask the organisers if they want you to help out by collecting rubbish in a bag.      (c)
Don’t notice it as you are busy planning how to get sponsorship for the next event.     (f)
Don’t notice it you are still in awe at being around so many bisexuals.   (a)
Glare at the person picking up rubbish, and complain about the inadequate rubbish collection facilities.   (e)
Ignore it, as you sit quietly in a corner, waiting for the next workshop.    (b)
Sigh, pick a piece up and wonder why others don’t take responsibility for their own event.   (d)

Q3    A call goes out for volunteers to help out with an event.  Do you:

Get excited and wonder what you could help out with.    (c)
Get excited that there’s going to be an event with …OMG…bisexuals!   (a)
Offer to help with leaflets, after all, it’ll be you running one next!   (d)
Offer to link them in with other organisations who might want to offer support.    (f)
Send the organisers a really helpful list of things they need to include and consider when running an event.   (e)
Wondered when the organisers would get around to organising another one you can go to.    (b)

Q4    Your copy of the BiCon Handbook states “Attendees are responsible for arranging their own travel and transport to BiCon”.  Your reaction is:

Great, I’m the best person to sort out my own transport.  Now, how much stuff am I taking with me?   (c)
I always arrange my own any way as I don’t know anyone to travel with.     (b)
That sounds sensible, I’ll let others know when and how I’m getting there so we can do it together.   (d)
That’s outrageous!  Don’t they know how to organise a conference?  The ones I go to always arrange transport for me…oh, wait…  (e)
What are the pros and cons of doing that?      (f)
What is BiCon?    (a)

Q5    Bi Community News (BCN) makes its regular plea for articles and letters.  Do you:

Check the submission deadline for your first article.    (c)
Don’t bother submitting anything as you’re busy writing a paper on “Bisexuals and Cat-Herding” for the Journal of Bisexuality.   (e)
Smile benignly at the existence of such wonderful grassroots newsletters.    (f)
Wish some other people would submit things, the Editor already has ten pieces articles from you.    (d)
Wonder what BCN is?    (a)
Wonder whether there will be any interesting articles in the next edition?     (b)

Q6    You walk through the doors at BiCon and see everyone sat around.  The first thing you do is:

Breathe a sigh of relief that you are back here again, your long lost home from home.   (d)
Get a drink and sit down quietly in a corner, nodding at a few familiar faces.    (b)
Grab a drink and move from table to table, making sure you talk to everyone.    (f)
Join your friends in the corner, complaining that your workshop on “A History of Bisexuals in the Middle of Nowhere” didn’t make the timetable   (e)
Scream OMG! It’s been so long since I saw you and run to give your friends a hug.    (c)
Swallow nervously and sit quietly in a corner.   (a)

Q7    It’s Pride season again.  You can be found:

Behind the Bi stall, helping others out and hoping it doesn’t rain.   (c)
Hobnobbing with the Pride organisers and the local mayor, promoting Bi issues ready for next year.   (f)
Nervously wandering around Pride, wondering if bisexuals actually exist.    (a)
On the march but too busy to stay on the stall.   (e)
Organising the Bi stall and taking photos for BCN, grateful for all the people who came along to help.   (d)
Wander around Pride collecting your yearly stash of freebies and saying hello to friends on the Bi stall.    (b)

Q8    Stonewall produces a piece of research about Bi Visibility.  Does it:

Annoy you because they have have been guilty of pushing Bi Invisibility in the past?   (d)
Frustrate you because they didn’t connect in with the fragmented bi community to work together?    (f)
Make you curious as you read about it on Twitter?     (b)
Make you think about actually filling in the survey that your friends found on Facebook?   (c)
Make you want to pull apart their obviously skewed and insignificant data?   (e)
Pass you by totally as you aren’t really into the gay scene?    (a)

Q9    How many different bisexual mailing lists are there?

A few Livejournal communities and BiCon    (c)
A few temporary events listings and some underused Yahoo mailing lists which proper activists just use to advertise their events on.   (e)
Activism, academic, funding Yahoo lists and some Livejournal communities and BiCon    (d)
One – for BiCon     (b)
Several that don’t seem to have a purpose or connect in with one another and don’t have an impact.   (f)
There are bisexual mailing lists?    (a)

Q10    Bisexuals…

Are attracted to men and women.    (c)
Are people who are attracted to more than one gender.   (e)
Don’t ‘alf faff a lot (but I wouldn’t be without them)   (d)
Just wanna have fun (as long as it’s at a BiFest or BiCon)   (b)
Need to get organised or they’ll never be taken seriously.   (f)
Out there, somewhere, maybe, if I squint.    (a)

Analysis

So, tot up your score and divide by the number you first thought of see what the pattern is…

Mostly a?  Nervous Newbie – You are new to the bisexual community and have yet to find your way around.  Don’t worry, talk to people and you’ll find that once you get past the excitability of the activists and academics, they are just ordinary people like you.  Remind yourself why you want to find other bisexuals if you wonder about coming to events.

Mostly b      Anonymous Attendee – You are part of the bisexual community, but for whatever reason, don’t get involved in running events or helping out.  You keep yourself to yourself.  Ask yourself, what do you get out of coming to BiFests and BiCon time after time, and drop a letter or email to the BCN letters page – we’d love to know!

Mostly c      Positive Participator – You like the bisexual community and have been in it long enough that you want to help it develop.  You’ve probably made a lot of friends and it’s become the place you socialise.  Keep it up and think, have you ever thought about getting a bit more involved in organising events?

Mostly d      Angry Activist – You’re one of the select few who actually walk the walk and don’t just talk the talk.  You enjoy what you do but sometimes you get tired of everyone expecting you to make things happen.  Don’t give up.  You might want to consider making sure you take a break though and not taking everything so personally.  Be angry about the lack of things happening, but don’t scare the bisexuals!

Mostly e      Argumentative Academic – You’re not really a practical person but more of a theorist.  The community does need theorists too to reflect on what worked.  You might have done the activism and now want to talk about it – great.  Or you may just be a talker who hasn’t actually done the practice.  In which case, perhaps you should think about doing not just talking?  Don’t forget to keep it real.

Mostly f      Potential Politician – gosh, it must be frustrating for you.  You don’t want to do, you might possibly attend events but you do have the good of the community at heart.  A community of people with nothing more in common than a loosely held definition and understanding of bisexuality.  You want them to get organised – have you considered taking up meditation?